What you Leave Behind
by arienette47
Summary: Shuffle challenge
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: I have a one chapter update on my Puck/Quinn story. Yes I know it's only one and I am sorry for that! I got a new job so it's been hard to find time to fit in to write a story. Seeing as how at my old job there wasn't much to do and I could write then. But I thought I'd give you a treat with posting a shuffle fic. This is about Rachel and Puck though so I'm sorry to upset any of my fans that like the other ship. I knew that the shuffle was going to involve Puck but I didn't know which leading lady until the first song came on. I pictured Rachel and not Quinn. Anyway I hope that you will all enjoy this anyway!**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Glee or any of the music in this story. So do not sue! 'k Thanks! ;**)

1. Pick a character, pairing or fandom you like.  
2. Turn on your music player and put it on random/shuffle.  
3. Write a drabble related to each song that plays. You only have the time frame of the song to finish the drabble; you start when the song starts, and stop when it's over. No lingering afterward!  
4. Do ten of these and then post them.

* * *

**What you Leave Behind**

**The Difference in Shade | Bright Eyes  
_And we'll stay like this, all golden and green  
The light collects and projects your heart on a movie screen  
And if you close your eyes  
We will always be the way you were the night  
You crawled inside of me_**

He stood in her pink pepto bismol bedroom in a black tux. She sat on her bed scowling, her dress was all rumpled and she looked like she was going to cry. He couldn't deal with Rachel Berry when she cried. He was still trying to calm himself down after the disaster at prom. He stood there for a second trying to figure out what to do. Next thing he knew he had crossed her room and stood in front of her stereo. He rolled his eyes as he put the cd into the player and a few seconds later music came blaring out of the speakers. He walked up to the edge of her bed and stuck out his hand, offering it to her. She looked up at him with tears threatening to fall from her eyes. She stared at him trying to understand his logic.

"Come on Berry, let's dance," He said simply.

She finally took his hand and stood up, timidly put her arms his neck as he put his hands on her waist. The stood there slowly swaying to the music. She rested her head on his chest.

"Thank you Noah, this is the sweetest thing anyone has done for me," She mumbled.

"Don't mention it,"

She was finally smiling and he could feel the tension leave his body completely.

***

**Express Yourself | Charles Wright  
_Some People have everything  
And other people don't  
But everything don't mean a thing  
If it ain't the thing you want_**

The room was buzzing as he made his way into the crowd. Everyone was dancing; he shouldn't be surprised about this. It's what people did at weddings. He looked over and saw Finn kissing Brittany as someone clinked his or her wine glass. He just shook his head. He was so mad he missed their first dance, they had probably been tripping all over themselves since neither one of them knew their left from right.

He stood by the door scanning the crowd until his eyes fell on the one person he was looking for. He watched as the music flowed freely through her, her brown hair falling behind her shoulders as she spun around with Kurt. He doesn't know how long he stood there watching her but after a few minutes her eyes met his and she basically pranced over to him.

"There you are! Finally!" She grabbed him by the lapels and dragged him out to the dance floor.

***

**Hum | Electric President  
_We sit on a rusty staircase  
You write your name with lipstick on the rail near the wall  
What do you think about me now,  
That I've fallen down_**

He was visiting her in New York. She was going to Julliard and acting in plays on Broadway. He was going to Ohio State; playing football this was only making their long distant relationship more difficult. They were in a bar at one of her cast parties after one of her Broadway plays wrapped. They hadn't really spoken at all that night. She was staring at her drink ignoring him. They had been off since he flown in. It had been months since they had seen each other and he hadn't originally had planned on flying out in October to see her. But after the few fights they had lately he wanted to make it up to her big time. She looked down at him from the step she was sitting on the stairs. There was a look in her eyes he had never seen before. It was disappointment; it was the same look his mother gave him when she found out about Quinn and the baby. But this time it hurt more. Rachel was never disappointed with him.

"You're not ready," She reads his mind. How did she always do that?

"Not yet,"

"I'm not waiting anymore,"

*******

**Maybe Sprout Wings | The Mountain Goats  
_A bad dream shook me in my sleep  
and I woke up sweating  
Ran through the dark to the shower  
Already forgetting_**

On the rare night he could sleep they always ended in nightmares. It was always the same dream, her walking down the stairs away from him and him not being able to get up after her. Except it wasn't a dream it was real. That's how it ended. They hadn't talked since. He didn't know exactly what to say. He couldn't give her what she wanted. Not yet anyway. He wanted to finish college. He wanted to show her he was worth marrying. Finn tried to tell him this time apart was good for them. That they could grow up and move on. But that's not what he wanted. At all. All he wanted was Rachel.

***

**Black Pear Tree | The Mountain Goats  
_I saw the future flowering like a ruptured vessel  
Somebody's gonna get screwed  
It won't be me  
Someday I'm going to walk out of here free_**

Noah Puckerman hated suits but he was wearing one for a greater good. He sat at the table and was trying to compose himself while he waited. But luckily he didn't have to wait too much longer until his name was finally called. He had won the New York Giant's drafting pick. He was going to New York, well technically New Jersey but still. He was going to win back Rachel.

He made his way up to the stage and shook the coach's hand. He took the jersey with the number 20 on it. Michael Johnson was long gone. When the camera zoomed in on him he was hopping she was watching him. He knew she didn't like football but that doesn't mean she wasn't watching right? She knew both he and Finn were up for the NFL Draft. And if anything she'd tune into support Finn?

He was going to go to the big apple. He was going somewhere with his life. He wasn't going to be a Lima Loser. And he was definitely going to fix things with Rachel. He'd give her the stupid ring the first time he saw if her that meant they could be back together.

***

**Outsider | The Ramones  
_All messed up, hey everyone  
I've already had all my fun  
More troubles are gonna come  
I've already had all my fun_**

He now knew what Rachel went through in high school. When he arrived at Ohio State he felt so out of place. He was fresh meat. The only thing he looked forward to was trying out for the football team. He had Finn, just as he had when he entered high school but it was different. There were more people here; he was no longer a big fish in a small pond. It intimidated him.

Rachel moved the final box into his dorm room snapping him out of his thoughts. He stood their staring at her.

"Noah, you'll be fine," She said smiling.

"What are you talking about Berry," He smirked.

"Oh don't even try to deflect with me! I know what you are thinking. I know you better than everyone, even yourself," She stomped.

"Alright fine… maybe I'm a little nervous," He admitted.

"And you have nothing to worry about. When you really let people in they all like you," she reassured him.

"Whatever,"

"And I'm only a phone call away," She whispered in his ear before she pulled him in for a kiss. That's really what he needed to hear. Is that she would always be there for him.

***

**Goodnight, Goodnight | Maroon 5  
_The room was silent as we all tried so hard to remember  
The way it feels to be alive  
The day that he first met her_**

He hadn't seen her since their last blow up at the bar when he visited a year and half ago. He stood at the door to her apartment and finally got the courage to knock on the door. The door opened a second later, music blasting and Rachel laughing at something on the other end of the phone she was holding. She looked up him shocked he was there.

"I'm going to have to call you back," She stammered into the phone before she dropped it.

They stared at each other for a few minutes. He was willing himself to say something to her but nothing came out. Her face twitched slightly.

"I don't really know what to say to you," She admitted.

"Well I am the one that came over here," He laughed bitterly.

"Yes, why did you?" Her eyes narrowed.

"To give you this," He said digging the black velvet box out of his pocket.

Her eyes blinked several times. "What is that?"

"What do you think it is?" He didn't want to answer question directly.

"Noah…" her voice was full of pity.

"Rach, I bought this for you a long ass time ago. I had it in my pocket that night. I just couldn't…"

"And now that we haven't seen each other in almost two years you get the courage to?" she said disbelievingly.

"I just want you,"

***

**Brand New Day | Joshua Radin  
_I fell asleep beneath you  
In the tall blades of grass  
When I woke the world was new  
I never had to ask_**

Their first time was not until the night of graduation. He remembers everything from that night. The way she looked at him, what she tasted like, the way she squeezed him tight when he came. It was honestly the best he has ever had. He held her all night and he knew that he wanted to wake up to her for the rest of his life. He was kind of mad they waited until then to do it. It made it that much harder when the both went off to school. That they couldn't dick around a few months enjoying the new level their relationship had reached. They didn't even have the summer. He left early for college to try out for the football team and she left to try to break out in Broadway. And even though it sucked that they were separated so soon he had never been so sure about something in his life.

They made a repeat showing in his twin bed in his dorm room and in her's as well. That had helped a little bit too.

***

**To Live Without It | Spill Canvas  
_I'll even help you put up your wall  
And I'll applaud you as you fall_**

He started acting out when the phone calls started to get fewer and fewer. They weren't breaking up; they were just in different states trying to start their lives. It just sucked it wasn't together. He started acting immature again and calling her Berry all the time. He knew she knew he was angry she was always too busy to have hour phone conversations with him. He tried to rationalize it to himself but he was always so afraid she'd leave him just like his dad did.

He had been a complete dick to her up until the night he showed up at her apartment for the last showing of her play. He had been on his best behavior to smooth things over but she didn't want any of what he was selling. She wanted to get to the bottom of the whole problem. He didn't want to talk about it. Just like he didn't want to talk about anything he was feeling. He was lucky that most of the time she could just read him like a book and he didn't have to vocalize anything. But she was sick of playing that game. She didn't talk to him all the way to the play nor in the cab ride over to the after party.

"What's going on with you?" She asked.

"Can we just sit together, like we used to," He begged.

He knew things weren't going good. But maybe if they were just close to each other again it would be fine. She nodded at him and that's how they found themselves on the stairs. Ultimately his decision would lead to their demise.

***

**Invincible | Muse  
_Follow through  
Make your dreams come true  
Don't give up the fight  
You will be alright  
'__Cause there's no one like you in the universe_**

"I never needed a ring," Rachel told him.

"What the hell do you mean you didn't need a ring?" He asked. They were out at dinner so he was trying to keep the cursing to a minimum.

"I wasn't trying to get you to propose to me back when we were in college," She explained.

"Then when did you tell me you wouldn't wait anymore?"

"I meant I wasn't going to wait for you to figure out if believed in you, in us."

"I did!" He hissed indignantly

"Oh really? Is that why you were acting bi-polar the last few months of our relationship?"

Okay, she had him.

"Does it really matter now?" He asked her trying to calm himself down. "You have one now, with the diamond the size of a freaking dime,"

"And while it is lovely Noah, I love it more for what it represents that what it looks like,"

"Oh yeah? And what does it represent?"

"That you believe in our relationship so much that you want to spend the rest of your life with me," she smiled sweetly at him.

He sighed; she is still the same old Rachel Berry that he met in high school. But damn did he love her because of it.

* * *

**A/N: Damn, that was hard… some of these I had to type super fast on so I could get out everything I was trying to say. Luckily most of the songs were 4 minutes and some change. it turned into a story kind of… the way it would go back and forth. That was completely unintentional. Sorry if Rachel is a little OOC… I really like the Rachel/Puck pairing but I always feel like what I type doesn't sound like her. She always talks on and on using big words and it just intimidates me. But when I turned on the first song I knew this story was about them. And I couldn't help it.**


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N: So after writing the story last night I really wanted to write the story from Rachel's point of view. Even thought I don't write her well I thought it would be interesting to show her side on how she saw things and how it didn't always match up with what Puck was thinking. So I turned my player on this morning and was blessed with these songs. Apparently the Fanfiction God's agreed with my sentiment. The filling in the gaps of his story was intentional. But I had really great songs so it was easy to do that. I also got really lucky with a six-minute song! Anyway I hope I do her justice. I don't have her ramble on as much as the show because in this story she is older and has matured. But I hope that she is still in character. I want to thank the people who reviewed. They made my day! **

**Disclaimer: Still don't own anything.**

**

* * *

**

**Got You (Where I Want You) | The Flys  
_Got you where I want you  
Hey, maybe just a smile  
Oh hey, did you know that I can dance?  
Could we talk for a while?_**

She comes to Ohio to see him. She knows it's her fault that their relationship has been so difficult lately. So after she finishes her midterms she flies out giving her understudy a chance to shine. She hopes he realizes how much she is sacrificing for him.

Right now they are in a bar not to far from his school. They are slow dancing in the middle of the floor between pool tables. Everyone is staring at them but he doesn't seem to care. She doesn't know if it is because he is truly happy she is there or if he is drunk. It could be a combination of the two. She doesn't get angry with him for it though. She knows she has been a bad girlfriend. Well that's what she feels like anyway. He started calling her Berry again. She knows that isn't a good sign.

"I missed you," He says into her hair and she responds by pulling him closer.

"I'm here now,"

"I wish you were always here,"

Okay so he had to be drunk. He never is that honest with her.

"Noah…" she sighs. He knows how much her dreams mean to her. He was just being selfish.

"I know. But that doesn't mean I don't feel that way," He answers. She doesn't even have to lecture him anymore. He can tell by her tone of voice what she is thinking. She loves and hates that about him.

"I love you, you know that right," She says pulling back to look at him in the eyes.

He does not look drunk at all to her.

"I love you too Rach,"

Good he isn't calling her Berry. Maybe this trip was worth it. She doesn't say anything, she just rests her head on his chest again as they sway to the music. She wishes he were always this close to her too.

***

**The Boys are Back in Town | John Darnielle Cover  
_Spread the word around  
Guess who's back in town_**

_"Didn't you see the NFL Draft?" Quinn scoffs at the other end of the line._

"No? Should I have?"

_"Puck joined the Giants," Quinn explains._

"So?" Rachel clearly doesn't understand and she didn't want to hear about him either.

_"The Giants are a New York team!" Quinn yelled for emphasis._

"Oh…" Rachel the realization hit her like a ton of bricks. "Oh!"

_"Yeah…He'll probably be on his way to see you as soon as he gets there,"_

"I doubt it, I haven't talked to him in almost two years,"

There is a knock on the door to her apartment. She stands there for a second wondering if Quinn knew something she didn't. No it couldn't be, this was real life. Not a movie.

_"Well if you see him on the street it's not because he a crazy stalker fan," Quinn goes on. _Rachel chuckles as she makes her way to the door. When she opens it she almost drops the phone right then and there. Right before her eyes is Noah Puckerman, just as Quinn has predicted.

"I'm going to have to call you back," Rachel faltered into the phone.

_"Is everything okay? Rachel?" Quinn said into the other end_.

Rachel clicked the phone off, this time allowing the phone to fall on the floor. Quinn better not have planned this. She would kill her.

***

**You Know You're Right | Nirvana  
_No thought was put into this  
I always knew it would come to this  
Things have never been so swell  
I have never failed to fail_**

She stood up and walked down the stairs past Noah, hoping and praying he wouldn't grab her ankle as she walked by. She made it to the end of the stairs and then made a beeline for the exit. She continued down the street the ten blocks back to her apartment. She was just so angry with him! Yes, she had been busy with her career and school but that did not mean she loved him any less. He did not trust their relationship and she couldn't be constantly reassuring him. At some point he had to believe in her.

He was not ready for a real relationship; he had answered that question point blank at the bar. She just shook her head at the thought. The anger was building up in her more as she took each step. It got to the point she was running down the streets of New York in a black cocktail dress with theater make up and heels on. People she passed must have thought she totally lost it. And maybe she did.

When she made it up to her apartment she walked in the living room. She needed to get rid of this anger and she did not know what to do. She did not want to sing. She saw the picture of the two of them sitting on an end table. She picked it up and chucked it out into the hallway outside her apartment. Glass shattered everywhere. To her it was the perfect metaphor. Then she picked up his bag and shoved it out the door slamming it behind her.

The next morning when she left for class the broken picture and his bag was still there but he was nowhere to be found.

***

**Born a Lion | Ani DiFranco  
_I got a big crush on you  
And it's crushing my mind  
Can I follow you home?  
And listen to what you think_**

So he might not have been her date to prom but he was the boy she left with. While Noah was for the most part an unsavory character he was showing her a new side of him lately and she liked this person. She was still very upset for what happened at prom but as he helped her up to her room and sat her on the bed, she was starting to forget and live in the moment. He was staring at her and it made her feel uncomfortable. Her skin felt like it was on fire and she was trying to calm down. She knew she looked like a mess but she didn't really care. She just wanted him to look at her like that forever.

***

**Champagne for my Real Friends, Real Pain for my Sham Friends | Fall Out Boy  
_Oh yeah, you caught me  
But I caught you one worse  
They say "You want war? You've got war,"  
But what are you fighting for?_**

Normally it's Noah who is late, but not this time. She had waited till the last minute to pack to go home for Thanksgiving and she missed her flight. She had to take a later flight and she knew he'd be pissed.

She walked into the terminal of the airport and he was seated down waiting for her. She hadn't expected to meet him at the gate. She looked at him oddly.

"You are late," He stated as he stood up. She couldn't tell if he was angry or not.

"I'm.." But before she could finish his lips crashed on hers and he kissed her hard.

Oh yeah she was in trouble.

"You are going to make it up to me later," He didn't even wait for a response before he started kissing her with the same intensity as he just did.

She could melt right there, in front of all the other passengers scattering past her towards baggage claim.

They might not be fighting with words but they were in fact fighting… and she didn't mind loosing just this once.

***

**What Sarah Said | Death Cab for Cutie  
_But I'm thinking of what Sarah said  
That love is watching someone die  
So who's going to watch you die?_**

All through high school she was told she was the crazy one. She was starting to think that she was the sane one and everyone else had been crazy especially their ringleader, Puck.

"You are insane!" She yelled at him still eyeing the box in his hand.

"Look Rach, we haven't been together for a year and it's been the worst year of my life. I don't ever want to go that long with out you again,"

Her face softened for a minute but then she shook her head.

"So much has changed since then," She rationalized. "I don't even know who you are now. I didn't even know who you were those last few months…"

"Come on Rachel please," He was begging. Noah Puckerman never begged... Well expect for… never mind stick to the situation at hand Berry.

"Please what Noah? Betroth myself to you?"

"That's what you want right?"

"Noah you can't just come here after two years and expect that I'm just going to drop everything for you. I have moved on. I have started my life,"

His face turned hard. She could tell he was going to start with the monosyllable responses and it wasn't fair. He came here; he couldn't just drop in and out of her life whenever he pleased. Well maybe that wasn't true. She was the one that pushed him out but he didn't exactly come after her either. They stood in silence for a while and then he pushed himself past her into her apartment. Her eyes widened.

"Well just make yourself at home!" She said sarcastically.

He walked over to her kitchen and rummaged around the bottom of one of her cabinets. He pulled out a bottle of vodka she had hidden. She rolled her eyes. He still knew her so well. He took two cups out of the cupboard and poured two glasses. He sat down on the floor and patted the ground next to him. She took her glass of vodka off the counter and sat down on the ground farther away from him then he had intended. The floor was cold under her and the chill made it's way from the floor and up her spine. She rested her back against the cabinet and picked up the vodka. She downed her glass to warm herself up. He reached up and picked the bottle up pouring her another drink.

"Can you please put that away?" She asks motioning to the box; it was still out sitting on the floor next to his foot. And she didn't want to acknowledge it with a real term just yet.

"It's for you," He told her again staring at her.

"I don't want it right now," she went back to shaking her glass slowly.

"Right now?"

"Yes, I don't want it _right now_," she repeated herself like she was talking to a child.

"But maybe later?"

***

**Bella Linda | The Grass Roots  
_To thoughtless things I do  
The dreams that don't come true  
'__Cause I'll never change, believe me I try  
If you go away, you know I'll die_**

She sighed as her phone vibrated for the fourth time in a row. It was not a text message but a phone call. And she could only imagine who it was from. She picked the phone up and pressed ignore. He had called her five times in the last two hours. She wasn't mad at him, they weren't having a fight this time but she needed to breath.

He always wanted to stay on the phone with her for long periods of time. At first she thought it was sweet but when her phone bill went through the roof and the calls started to cut into her time to make friends and practice for her plays she grew annoyed. He didn't even talk that much on the phone. He didn't talk much period. It was always her that talked.

She could be such an idiot sometimes. They were hours apart and he just wanted to feel close to her again. Her ramblings made him feel better. She picked up her phone and dialed his number.

_"Ignoring my calls now Berry?" He grunted into the phone._

"Sorry, I hit the wrong button," She assured him.

_"Yeah the fifth time I called,"_

"I was in dance rehearsal before," she tried. She knew he knew her schedule but he let that lie slide.

_"Since you came here last time I'm coming to see you," he told her._

She wasn't sure if that was a good thing or not.

***

**Asleep on a Sunbeam | Bell and Sebastian  
_I could watch dreams flicker in your eyes  
Lying here asleep on a sunbeam  
I wonder if you realize you fascinate me so_**

She woke up the next morning. He was still sleeping. She cuddled herself closer to him. Last night was her first time and she was still coming down from the high. She looked up at him. He looked so peaceful. He never looked like this during the day. She smiled to herself. She was so happy she got to see him like this, at his most vulnerable. A side he never showed anyone else. His arm tightened around her and she let herself be pulled closer to him.

"Go back to sleep," he said sleepily.

She didn't respond she just closed her eyes and enjoyed the feeling of just laying there next to him. She wanted to have this feeling forever. She kept the thoughts of starting college the next week at bay. This is all that mattered to her right now. Being here with him. He really had no idea how much she loved him. She snuggled up to him as much as she possible could.

"Stop moving around," He whined as he kissed the top of her head.

She smiled into his chest.

***

**Returning to the Fold | The Thermals  
_But I still have faith  
If I ever had faith  
Wait for me  
Wait for me_**

She was cleaning out her apartment one day. She wanted to do it every six months but her schedule did not allow for it. Her closet was especially packed. She grabbed everything out of it and dumped it on the floor. She felt something fall from the top shelf and hit her on the head.

It was his bag. The one he left here after she walked out on him at the bar. She unzipped the bag. There was a shirt and a pair of jeans. She pulled the shirt out. It was one of his football shirts from high school. It still smelled like him. She closed her eyes to keep from crying.

She didn't get rid of it. She put the bag back in her closet. But she wore that stupid shirt to bed every night. It helped her fall asleep.

***

**Paths of Victory | Cat Power Cover  
_Trails of trouble  
And your road of battle  
They lead paths of victory  
We shall walk_**

He started coming over once a week since the day in the kitchen. They didn't talk much about the incident or the past. They just made small talk about their lives as they were now. She didn't know what to think of it all, if it was worth all this effort. They both looked so tired every time they were around each other.

But then he started suggesting that they go out and do things. It started out as small outings. Going to get coffee or see a movie. When they grew more comfortable with each other he started to go to her plays and she went to his games. Every once in a while he would take a dance class with her. She really enjoyed that.

Tonight was different, he had taken her to see the Christmas tree in Rockefeller Center be lit. Her face lit up as much as the tree. They went back to his apartment for hot chocolate to warm up. She was sitting on the couch in his living room enjoying the view when he walked in holding two mugs. He handed one to her. She brought it to her lips to take a sip, but was not met with the warm chocolately goodness she was expecting. Something furry hit her lip. She frowned looking at him and he chuckled. She looked down into the cup. A small velvet box was sitting in the cup. A small smile came to her face and she shook her head at him.

"What? It's later," He reminded her.

"Much," She smiled back.

_.Fin_.

**

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A/N: So I hope that wasn't too painful and I hope everyone enjoyed the story. I was surprised with what came out in the last chapter and it was fun to sit down and let the rest of the story pour out. I hope that this chapter didn't ruin any of the storyline from the last chapter or feel forced. **


End file.
